HOME
E-CARDS
WALLPAPER GALLERY
LOVEBUG STORE
FREE LOVEBUGMAIL
|
|
HOME |
E-CARDS |
WALLPAPER GALLERY |
LOVEBUG STORE |
FREE LOVEBUGMAIL |
|
|
Relationship ArticlesNeed advice on dating and relationships or tips on turning up the romance in your marriage? You'll find all kinds of helpful information here about love, romance, and relationships. |
Great Relationships: How to Solve Problems and Have Fun Too
I recently came across this quote: "There is a time in the life of every problem when it is big enough to notice and small enough to solve." When problems come in our relationships they can bring a great deal of stress into our lives. While problems do bring stress and are important to properly handle, our response to the problem is more important than the problem itself. How stressful a problem is can be determined to a large extent by our response to it. Many of us have learned avoidance as a way of handling problems. "If I just ignore this, maybe it will go away" is what we think. If you hear an alarming noise in your car, just turn up the radio. No noise, no problem. Richard Bach, author of "Jonathan Livingston Seagull" and "Illusions," has this to say about problems: "There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands. We seek problems because we need their gifts." What would it be like if, instead of avoiding problems, we were to lean into them and seek their gifts? In order to lean into problems, we have to approach them in a different way. As Albert Einstein said, "You cannot solve a problem with the same level of thinking that created the problem." We need creative problem-solving skills that allow us to not only learn from the problem, but have fun and strengthen us as well. Here are three creative ways to approach problems. Movie solutions Often the difficulty is that we have only our view of the problem with which to work. So what would it be like to get a variety of different perspectives on the solution to the problem? Here's a simple three-step process for getting a different perspective. Hold a problem in your imagination for a moment. Think of a favorite character or a movie you have seen that you strongly related to. Ask the question, "How would this person have approached and solved this problem?" You may get solutions from this exercise or only a different way to look at the problem. Either way is a win. Use your own judgment about the appropriateness of the solutions. Question solutions Motivational expert Tony Robbins offers us five questions for approaching problem-solving in a different way. They serve to help us reframe our approach to the problem. The five questions are: What's good or great about this situation? What's not perfect yet? What am I willing to do to solve this problem? What am I no longer willing to do to solve this problem? What actions can I take that will help me solve the problem and enjoy the process? Crazy solutions Lastly, let's look at a process that I typically use to help parents solve power struggles with their teenagers. It's applicable for our purposes as well. Here are the six easy steps. Identify the problem. Identify one or two solutions that you have tried that just don't seem to work, and then discard them. Come up with crazy, ridiculous, absurd, outlandish solutions that you would never do, but are absolutely fun to think about. Come up with creative alternative solutions to the problem. Sometimes the seed for these creative ideas are in the crazy ideas. Other times you have simply been able to step back far enough from the problem to be creative. Once you have your creative solutions, take massive action toward solving the problem. Pay attention to the results you are getting. If it's working, you can keep doing it if necessary. If it's not working, repeat steps three to five until you get a solution that works. What we have looked at are three simple approaches to creative problem-solving. Have fun trying them out in your own life. For more tips and tools for a great relationship visit relationship coach Jeff Herring's SecretsofGreatRelationships.com
MORE RESOURCES:
Relationships - Google News |
 |
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
60 Words and Phrases that Make Men Fall Deeper in Love The interesting thing about getting the love you deserve is that you have a great deal of influence in the kind of love you get. Most times, the love one gets is a function of the kind of love one gives. 8 Ways to Improve Your Long Distance Relationship Couples in love may often find themselves having to live apart for a period of time throughout their relationship due to job commitment, studies, military obligation and etc. This has made us wonder whether a relationship can survive the physical distance. Second Time Around the Block Divorce happens. I'm not going to debate the causes or the moral and ethical implications of that here. Rescue and Rebuild Your Relationship: 7 Tips to Make it Work Create Time To Share And Time On Your Own.Establish time to spend together and time for yourself. Relationship Advice: How to Ignore Your Spouse or Partner Marriage can be one of the quickest and most effective paths to taking someone special for granted.We don't mean to do it. My Fairy Tale Is Gone Dear Candace,My girlfriend and I recently split up. I called her a few days ago and she said that it was over and that she did not want to discuss it with me anymore, that I had gotten on her nerves to the point where she didn't see any point in communicating with me, ever. Relationship Advice: 9 More Must-Know Tips for Couples The Law of Two QuestionsThere are two questions that couples must ask and answer:1) What do I want?2) How do I help you get what you want?The Law of Conflict, Part 1Much conflict is the result of failing to ask both of the above questions and/or an overemphasis on either one of the two.The Law of Conflict, Part 2Conflict is an inevitable part of being with someone. Valentine's Day is Fast Approaching, So Gather the Chocolates and Lingerie That lover's holiday we know as Valentine's Day is coming up again. This year, be prepared for it. Single in a Couples World Advertising for St. Valentine's Day seemed more relentless than ever this year. Catch a Cheating Lover? Relationships. Virtually all of us are in one, or at some stage, have been. A Look at Interracial Relationships There's something about America, our history, our values or maybe the very contradictions of our society that can still make interracial relationships a lot more difficult than others. Most relationships deal with mostly internal pressures with perhaps a little added tension from family or friends. Sad Scientific Facts About Love Disaster results when we see women trying to change a man's behaviour. According to evolutionary biologist Rosie Mestel, what women perceive as bad male behaviour (lying, cheating, ogling other women) is actually part of a biologically based prime directive to procreate as fast as possible. Picking Up The Pieces "My feelings have changed," my boyfriend of five years told me during one of our nightly seven o'clock phone calls. "I don't think we should see each other anymore. Celebrate Friendship Day with Fresh Flowers! Send flowers this Friendship Day, Sunday, August 7th! Across the street or across the country, a local florist can send a gift of Friendship to your Special Friend!Consider sending a friend a beautiful vase of her (or his) favorite flowers to celebrate National Friendship Day! Here are some gift ideas to inspire you;For the Gardener: Send a watering can filled with wildflowers and a raffia bow. Green Thumbs would also appreciate a Green or Blooming Plant in a decorative basket or container. Wow, Grandma Is Dating! Wow, Grandma Is Dating!When Lena, 52, began dating, her son, Paul, joined the same dating site. Together, mother and son set out to find love. The Secret Power of Romance and How It Can Work for You There are some men who will never understand the importance of romance. They may be lazy or don't feel like investing any of their time for something silly like romance. Never Ever Show Youre Jealous O.k. Great Relationships: What to Do When You Have Drifted Apart Picture, if you will, the following scene:A man and woman, somewhere in the great expanse of middle age, walk into a sandwich shop and sit down. They don't speak to each other. Relationship Failing? Consider Your Ways WhenWe all need to consider our ways. So many times we operate in a state of being that is selfish and inconsiderate. Looking for a Lasting, Deeply Satisfying Relationship? "Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction."~Antoine de Saint-Exupery, 1900-1944, French Aviator and WriterIf you are looking for a lasting, deeply satisfying relationship, you might want to consider Antoine's definition of love.
|
|
